B+ Household Work

I think as a society we have come to value specialization. You get these accounts on social media channels that specialize in cleaning your house, or cooking, or organizing and they show you how you can have what they have. They show you what is possible if you’re willing to spend a lot of time and effort in that one area. Take for example the youtuber who shows you how to clean your house. They’re showing you how to remove your toilet seat to get your toilet really clean. My first thought is: do I know anyone in real life who actually takes the time to do this? Does any normal person whose job is not to show people “the correct” way to deep clean a toilet do this?

This applies to all areas of household work, whether it be laundry, organization, decluttering, cooking, couponing. You name it, there is probably some “expert” out there telling you “the best way” to do xyz. 

And I get it. Specialization sells. I’m thinking there may not be that many people googling “clean bathroom bare minimum”. Probably because it’s pretty self-explanatory and very boring. You want to know the best way. You’re all in on that. 

Here is my problem with this model or what I will call hyper-specialization which I define as trying to specialize in everything or many, many areas where a passable job is good enough. It is exhausting. And it creates unrealistic expectations for the many who fall prey to it’s illusions of glamor. In my view there is nothing glamorous about wasting my life away trying to attain and maintain a high level of proficiency in many areas that I categorize as “life-sustaining” rather than “life-building” activities.

What do I mean by this? I mean that it is not my life’s purpose to do laundry. Or clean. Or organize. Or cook meals. Or exercise. I could keep going. I do these things because they facilitate the “life-building” parts of my life. My relationships with my family and friends. My personal growth and progress. My spiritual journey. 

I’m not saying that you should stop taking the toilet seat off of your toilet when you’re cleaning if that brings you joy. I’m also not saying there isn’t joy to be had in some of the “life-sustsaining” activities. Some people get immense joy out of creating and enjoying good food and so they spend more time cooking. That is wonderful if you have identified that and you are structuring your life in a way to support that. I myself love folding my clothes and linens in the KonMarie style. Is there a faster way that is more passable and requires less effort. Yes. And I continue in this practice because I enjoy it. 

My husband’s actual shirts, actually folded by me, because I get a weird satisfaction from folding clothes.

What I am saying is: release yourself of the expectation that you should follow what the expert does in all of these areas. Decide for yourself what things truly bring you joy and light you up, and then figure out how to do the rest in as streamlined a way as possible. 

The other note I will add is: your preferences can (and probably will change) as you enter new seasons of life. Take cooking for example. Before I became a parent, when I was working a full-time corporate job and cooking for my husband and myself, I really enjoyed cooking. I would get excited about trying out a new recipe and I enjoyed the process. Now fast forward a decade and we have 2 young kids. I am all about efficiency. There isn’t a ton of joy in the process for me. Maybe that joy will come back at a different season of life.